Hello, and thank you for visiting. I wanted to talk about how I have set myself goals and milestones to achieve for the coming year and the near future. As in the title of this post, I wanted to describe my perspective on how goals should be set and achieved.
“The one golden rule to remember is that we are living every day, and if every day isn’t fun in some way, then we are wasting our lives away”Leo Legacy
When we set ourselves goals, they are usually things that we know we need to start or stop doing in life but fail to do so. The goal will then be set to overcome the challenge. It’s all good and everything will work fine, you will achieve your new year’s resolutions and smash all your goals, right?
Well, it was only on the third day of the new year, that I was presented with a situation which got in the way of me being able to achieve my goals and new year’s resolutions. The “intention” was/is to walk to work every day and take a walk during lunch every day, I had woken up late, so I had to take my car to work, and the catering services were closed so I had to drive to purchase food during lunch time which also prevented me from walking at lunch. After finishing work, I was busy until it was too late to post anything to my website or meet any other goals, I had set daily.
Normally this would be a problem I would feel the need to discipline myself for, only the third day in and I am not persistent with the goals and resolutions I set a few days ago! What good am I going to do for the rest of the year if I can’t maintain three days without missing a day?
The first step I took to start achieving my goals and making life changes was to stop creating new year’s resolutions. The reason for this was because they were very limiting, they could only be set once a year and sometime after January you lose track of the passion that drove you towards them in the first place. How many people do you see or hear talking about achieving their new year’s resolutions after January? 6 months on and do you speak to your friends, family, and colleges about how well you are doing with your new year’s resolutions? No, they were just silly ideas you liked to give yourself when getting excited about starting a new year. So, I stopped making new year’s resolutions and thought about what I really wanted and how achieve it.
Well, this is where I come back to how life and the goals, we set ourselves need to be fun and have leeway. We can’t set out our day with too much of a serious head on us to achieve our goals or else, when we cannot achieve them for whatever reason, the doubt and self-talk can burden the full process completely.
In the past I have found myself creating reasons for why my goals are unrealistic and I just end up doing my normal every day routine I have been doing since I can remember, the goals become things I know I need to be doing again and I go back to just “being”, and not much doing of anything I had set out to achieve. Which is why the entire process of goal setting and achieving needed to change for me, it was 3 years on, and I hadn’t hit any goals I had set back in 2014.
At that point I was out of work and desperately looking for employment so I had a lot of goals I needed to achieve, and I needed a plan to prevent myself being in this situation again, so it had to be a realistic, achievable long-term plan, which could change with how I progressed.
It wasn’t intended to be a two-year plan, I first set myself the long-term goal of getting into a position where I could start enjoying life. So, in December 2017 / January 2018, I said to myself, by 2020 I will have built myself back up into a position where I have a car, a stable job, I can start going away on holidays, find love and restart my passion projects, interests, and hobbies. A rebuild from my big crash so I can be refurbished and ready to go. As a side note, the original goal setting was for July 2019 but because things didn’t go to plan by that time, I simply extended it and continued a positive path to finishing my goals, which was ironically December 2019, exactly two years.
This type of long-term goal setting helped give breathing space to achieve what I wanted and a target for the rest of my goals to work towards. So, setting no more new year’s resolutions since the start of 2018 has removed the need to wait until new year to set goals and allowed me to be more realistic with my goals to set. I can also introduce new goals in the year but making it part of the bigger two-year goal I had previously set.
The most important lesson I learned was to continue towards your goal, there is no such thing as “times-up” Or failing you just must keep pushing on until the goal has been achieved. It’s a milestone to attain rather than a deadline to hit, or goal must have targets but during that time, especially during the start of a new hobby like the gym, you need to have fun with it and stay persistent. Doing the gym once a week at first, then increasing it in February, each month you set mini goals to increase on your previous goals, I found doing this kept me focused and never let the goals leave my mind or allow me to fall back into “business as usual” state of doing what I’ve always done.
To summarise what I’m saying here When we are going about our everyday living, when we are faced with several types of situations that we are unable to avoid, that get in the way of our goals, we can’t get down about it or let it disgruntle us. So, when we are doing our goals and setting our goals, we need to realise these challenges and give ourselves elasticity, or else we’ll snap and give up. But not too much that we buckle and go floppy! Ha!
We need to make sure we have fun every day and make sure we keep moving forward. If we do find ourselves being too harsh on ourselves for not attaining our goals or being able to keep up with what we expected we need to remember, relax, and use that day as a chill day and continue to move on the next day or the following day if we make sure we pick it up and carry on moving forward. That then removes a lot of pressure from being able to achieve our goals.
As a side note telling other people about my goals can create accountability but it can also be a burden to us, so I usually have always kept them to myself until much further on in the stages, then maybe I bring it up in conversation.
So, my list out of my rambling (I like Lists)
- Set myself long term goals that will make the changes I want to see in my life.
- Set mini goals that will change and complete often but work towards the larger goals.
- Increase my goal setting throughout the year, increasing.
- Give myself away days, relax days and don’t let the goals be a burden.
- Have fun setting and playing with goals to help keep track and an interest.
- A countability partner to help but I personally find them a burden.
- Maybe keeping the goals secret so I don’t apply unnecessary social pressure.
- Don’t give up, there aren’t any hurdles I’m not expecting, they come daily and have nothing to do with my goals.
- If I really must stop working towards a specific goal, I find a suitable replacement.
- Have fun.
That will hopefully allow me to stay persistent and constantly moving forward.